Full Heart.

I rode my bike down across the river today. I took my regular route home that winds down through Allston, along the frontside of Harvard stadium & popping right up into Somerville through Harvard Square. The whole time my legs were filled up with so much freedom. They gained pace & seemed lighter than ever before as I zoomed past cars that were carelessly idling.

This morning I woke up with my heart in my chest. When I was going over the bridge to Harvard I could feel it louder than it’s been lately. I imagined if somebody were pressed against my body it would have shaken them like the crashing of Pacific waves against cliffs.

Quincy has been gone for the past few days. I didn’t realize how much he had become part of my life until he wasn’t around. I guess that’s why it is good for partners to leave each other every now and again. Sometimes I think that I forget to really say & show that I love people. I don’t think that I am the only one though. If I am – so bet it – send me your tips!

Last weekend my friends were in from Toronto & New York and for the first time I knew how big of an impact friends have on our lives. After college I think we are all adjusting to new spaces – parts of us that are hollowed out and others that are filled up too fast. I imagine this isn’t specific to leaving college, but that it is an experience that will continue throughout our lives.

Instead of trying to fill the hollow spots where specific people used to be I am trying to recognize how full of love they have always been.

How full of love they will always be.

— Maple Walnut Butter Bars —

Preparation: 30 min.
Cook Time: 20 min
Serves: 10-12 ppl

ingredients.

– 2 1/2 cups brown rice flour
– 1/4 tsp sea salt
– 1 cup coconut oil
– 1 cup pure maple syrup
– 1 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
– 1 1/2 cups walnuts, chopped & toasted at 200°
– sprinkle of brown sugar

Preheat over to 375°.

Line a 9×11 baking sheet with parchment paper & set aside.

Combine the brown rice flour & sea salt in a medium bowl, set aside. In a large bowl, mix together coconut oil, maple syrup, and vanilla extract until smooth. You may have to use an electric mixer to get the right consistency. With the electric mixer on low, mix in the flour & salt adding 1/3 at a time.

If there are a few small lumps in your batter that’s ok! Just try not to over-mix the brown rice flour or your batter will become too much like taffy. Once it is mixed, press the batter into your 9×11 baking sheet. Spread evenly across the bottom of the pan. Press walnuts firmly into better & sprinkle brown sugar over the top. Bake on 375° for 15 min. Enjoy!

 

p.s. This recipe was adapted from Flying Apron’s Gluten Free & Vegan Baking Book!

Peanut Butter Coconut Cream Cookies

On Sunday evening, I sat around the television with some friends tracking the approaching hurricane. Fortunately, for Boston, Monday only brought heavy rains and strong winds. As I am sure you all know by now, not other regions were as lucky. We sent messages to our friends in New York making sure their apartments weren’t underwater or damaged. By in large, our friends were some of the people whose apartments were spared from damage. For everyone else, my warm thoughts go out to you during this period. It seems like during times of crises I realize the difficulty to string together language that consoles and supports others. To all my friends in New York, my thoughts go out to you. If you need a box of any vegan treats send me a message and they will be in the mail.

That being said, Monday we were stuck inside in Boston. I spent most my day catching up on rest from a work event Sunday evening. I thought it would be nice to occupy my time by baking up some cookies. We spent time inside together catching up on our week and cooking food together. For some reasons cookies in the oven & lazy days inside remind me of home.

I have been gone from California for a quite a bit of time now. I haven’t truly been home to stay (at least) for a very long time. I miss California some days, the family & all my friends. That’s the interesting thing about life after college. You start to come to terms with the idea that you are building your own home, complete with family & friends. My sister has been sending me ultrasound pictures lately of my future nephew and every time I ask my partner to make out the face, the small toes, and hands for me because I can’t see them myself.

We are back in Boston. I make deliveries to everyone’s bedroom of fresh cookies. I see their faces light up as they are still in pajamas or waking up over tea even though it’s 2 pm. I’m standing in the kitchen staring out at the storm wondering if the rain will ever stop. Wondering if I ever imagined myself 22 years old in my partner’s house baking vegan cookies in Boston. Wondering whether the cookies taste good.

I think of how big the word family feels tucked inside my lips.

— Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip* Cookies —

Preparation: 30 min.
Cooking: 12-14 min.
Yields: 2 dozen cookies.

ingredients.
-2 cups whole wheat flour
-1 tsp baking soda
-3/4 tsp sea salt
-1 cup chunky unsalted peanut butter
-2 tbs coconut cream
-3/4 cup pure maple syrup
-2 tsp vanilla extract
-1/2 cup almond milk
–1 package fair-trade chocolate chips

directions.

Preheat the over to 350°. Line a baking pan with parchment paper & set aside. In a medium mixing bowl, mix together flower, baking soda & sea salt. In a large bowl, mix together  peanut butter, coconut cream, maple syrup, vanilla extract & almond milk. Mix the dry ingredients with the wet ingredients, add the flour mixture 1/4 at a time. Once it is thoroughly mixed add chocolate chips.

Spoon (1 tbs) onto baking sheet lined with parchment paper & press down with fork. Sprinkle sea salt & sugar in the raw over the top. Bake for 12-14 min. Cool for 5 min. Dip in a glass of almond milk & enjoy!!!

For other great cookie recipes visit